Friday, July 28, 2006

Why I Hate Jason Burke

I'm posting this story as a warning to anyone who might be tempted to order medicine or other drugs through the Internet.

It all started about a year and a half ago. I got home from work and found one of those automated messages on my answering machine from Federal Express. The mechanical woman's voice (why are these telephone automatons always women?) telling me that there was a package for Jason Burke, and that it would be held for five days. I didn't think to much of it, except to hope that Jason Burke would think to call FedEx to find out what happened to his package. About a week later, I came home to find several “hang up” calls on my answering machine. Later that evening I got a phone call from a heavily accented Hispanic man asking for Jason Burke. I explained that he had the wrong number.

A month or so later, the same thing happened again---the automated FedEx message followed by the Hispanic caller, all looking for Jason Burke. By now I'm starting to think I've been the victim of identity theft. I did all the things you're supposed to do for that, checking my credit card statements etc, and nothing seemed to be amiss. Finally I called FedEx, after discovering that this company purposely does not list the local phone numbers of any of their offices---what a pain. The person on the 1-800 FedEx number assured me that they would change the number listed for Jason Burke's account.

A month later, same thing---FedEx call, followed by multiple Hispanic phone calls. This time I went to the local FedEx office myself. “I'm the person who is not Jason Burke,” I announced. The district manager pulled out the package in question: “You don't live at...(announcing the address, which I'm very tempted to post)? You didn't order something from the online pharmacy?”

“No,” I said. “Do I look like a Jason Burke?”

“We'll change the phone number on his account. He's a regular customer.”

That didn't surprise me. To make a long post longer, I got nowhere with FedEx, which never did change the number, or with the multiple Hispanics who called me from the Mexican online pharmacy asking me if I needed a refill on my Vicodin. Finally I called Jason Burke, whose number is publicly listed and FedEx could easily have looked up. Turns out that Jason Burke used my phone number to order his drugs. More than once. The first time I called him he sounded totally stoned. After he sobered up I talked...er...threatened to sue him again if he continued to use my number. He canceled his Mexican online pharmacy account.

The Mexican online pharmacy is still calling me regularly a year and a half later, sometimes as often as eight times a day. That's why I'm posting this story as a cautionary tale for anyone thinking about ordering medications through the Internet. If you do it once, they will haunt you forever. If someone uses your phone number to do it, they will haunt you forever.

In the meantime, Jason Burke's correct phone number is...

No, I can't do it. Besides, it's public information. Anyone can look it up.

18 comments:

Dinah said...

So, aside from the 8 calls a day, I'm trying to figure out why this is a problem. They have your phone number, but Mr. Burke's credit card. The way I figure it, when they call, place an order for oh, say, a 90 day supply of something good (my drug of choice is chocolate but maybe we could get Roy some Concerta? that stuff is expensive). When Fedex calls, get the box, it gets billed to Mr. Burke, Roy goes in overdrive, his dirty socks get picked up, his wife loves the blog. What could be better. If they make chocolate in a pill form, please order me some.

NeoNurseChic said...
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Steve & Barb said...

A large percentage of mail-order drugs from other countries are not what they say they are, so there's another reason to avoid them. (Of course their FedEx recipients are also not who they say they are, so what do you expect?)

Thanks for the thought, Dinah, but Concerta gives me headaches. Like Carrie has. Perhaps we can get some Imitrex for her (that's expensive stuff).

ClinkShrink said...

Thank you all for your comments and suggestions. I'm not sure the online pharmacy carries chocolate but I bet they do have something like Seroquel. Maybe some chocolate-covered Seroquel?

Why doesn't FedEx ever mistake me for the only heir to a multimillion dollar fortune? I keep waiting and waiting for that will to be delivered.

NeoNurseChic said...
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Steve & Barb said...

It ain't chocolate-covered Seroquel, but perhaps some ganja gumballs?

Or maybe those dissolve-on-your-tongue Seroquel PocketPaks?

Steve & Barb said...

What a nightmare, Carrie. That's why I think our insurance "system" is just a scam. Whenever folks have disputes like this, make noise at the Insurance Commissioner's office, and let the insurance company know you are doing so. You have to be a squeaky wheel.

On a different note, I'm waiting for Clink or Foo to write something on Ms. Yates. From the little bit I know from the papers, sounds like the right decision.

Sarebear said...

Holy Crap! Med $$$ suck.

Try some chocolate Viactiv! It's a chocolate-delivery system for calcium for women, although I'm sure it wouldn't hurt men, lol. Especially good for lactose-intolerant people like me.

I am so glad that Wyeth and Pfizer have been sending me my 300mg Effexor/day and my 1200mg Neurontin/day prescriptions, a three month supply at a time, for free. Course, we're rather poor, but a couple thou above what it'd qualify for Medicaid.

And then there's my SSDI & SSI application/appeal going into its third year now (although at the point I'm at, and with having a lawyer, 90% of the people at this point get approved).

The Effexor being about $200 a month, if I had to pay, and the Neurontin, oh, I forget but $100 or more at least.

Course, I'm about to run out of Neurontin, because the doc had me up for a month or two on 1600, so I've used it up too fast . . . and he's not in, mornings, so I'll be cutting it real close, down to the last pill, before he's in on Mon/Tues for me to pick up a prescription, that don't know how to pay for. I don't think you are s'posed to quit gabapenting cold turkey. Technically, we just got insurance this week but I have NO information on it yet.

Sorry to ramble! 8 calls a day, YIKE! You can set up something with your phone company to have specific phone numbers blocked from being able to get through to you . . . do a *69 to find out what the number is right after they call you.

NeoNurseChic said...
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Dinah said...

Oh, I was once at this incredible Cuban restaurant, I think it was at Walnut, around 13th... much more fun than Blue Cross Blue Shield.

ClinkShrink said...

I was at Walnut Street once during an APA conference, but that was to visit the site of the first American jail.

Dinah said...

It was at that very same APA that I was sipping tropical drinks and eating duck (yes, I remember now, it was support duck I was eating) in a delicious cherry sauce, while sitting with my support psychiatrist friends. Little did I know that at that precise moment you were viewing the country's first jail only blocks away. Why does this difference in our preferred activities not surprise me?

ClinkShrink said...

Noooo.....Put Down The Duck.....

OK: "You're short, you're yellow and you make weird noises."

The Platypus said...

Just like Mr Burke's number is listed in the book, it prob'ly wouldn't be all that hard to find numbers for the DEA or FBI. Hydrocodone is a controlled substance and, assuming he doesn't have a valid prescription, this would be an easy catch to make their statistics look good. I'm sure it would get Mr Burke out of your hair for a while.

I like Dinah's idea too.

NeoNurseChic said...
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Dinah said...

Jim's Cheesesteaks. Get it with the CheeseWiz and to hell with ClinkShrink and her heart happy thoughts. Today's NYTimes has an article on how we're all getting bigger and lifespans and health are improving. Add fried onions.

The Cuban place, I'll get you the name when I can, was not takeout, didn't have outdoor seating, and wasn't in grad student budget range (ah, out of town conventioneers are big money spenders). Maybe 3 years ago?

I was at Penn for college, visited boyfriend a lot the following year (now husband/doggy mind reader), and he recently started working in philly again, but mostly his lunches seem to be The Capital Grille and a lot of Amtrak stories. I think most of the restaurants have changed...back then I went to Smokey Joes, Doc Watson's, knew the pizza places and cheesesteaks, and I hear Ho So Gai is still there (try the peking beef) in Chinatown. Oh, there was some incredibly crowded deli (2hr wait) in west philly, a takeout with amazing chocolate cheesecake--Sorry Clink(-- in case you haven't figured it out, I do not suffer from migraines or food sensitivities). . Please note, Clink has lost a lot of weight recently and she is no longer quite so fun to be with, except that she did drag me off on a Segway.

NeoNurseChic said...
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NeoNurseChic said...
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